Calorie Whore

First off, thanks to whoever reported my blog as offensive and had my last post deleted... there was a warning and I guess I'll have to censor myself from now on... lmao not gonna happen.

So I'm struggling right now with the whole calorie intake thing.  It's driving me insane.  My goal this week is to accurately track my caloric intake instead of just estimating.  To help, I've actually started using the daily plate instead of just playing on it, to help me track everything and suffice it to say that it's driving me insane.  I entered in my food as I went throughout the day in hopes of keeping on track and being able to make up any extra (if any) before 9pm.  Could I do it?  Nope.

I thought I was doing really well with my day but I was still coming up short and I mean WAY short and then I threw in my work out and now I'm lacking (PS: I really don't think that the workout is accurately accounted for on there because I think it said I burned approx. 882 calories, which seems absurd so I'll have to keep playing around with that a little).  I was successful in getting my water in but that's nothing new since all I drink is water and lots of it.

I got to dinner last night and I was hungry so I had my dinner and waited a little while, was still hungry so I had an extra serving of protein.  Feeling guilty, I quickly jumped online to track it eventhough I was ashamed only to find that I'm still WAY under.  I went to the gym feeling guilty but knowing that my workout would make me feel better and it did.  I had to go grocery shopping after the gym so I didn't eat anything right away and by the time we were checking out I was starving again.  I threw the kid and groceries in the van and literally inhaled a granola bar because I was so hungry.  When we got home I put all of the groceries away and got little man off to bed and was STILL hungry.  I had some cheese, a couple of crackers and some grapes and half an hour later I was still hungry so I had a glass of water.  After my water my brain was telling me that I wanted more food and I just couldn't do it anymore, I was getting pissed off with all of the extra food (especially so late at night because I was tired, it was almost 9:30) so I just said screw it and went to bed.  I was lying in bed going through my day in my head thinking about all of the food that I had consumed and thought to myself, "Oh my God, I'm never going to get enough calories in, EVER!  Unless of course I become a calorie whore!"

So today's a new day and I'm going to work on pimping myself out to calorie Gods in hopes that I can come somewhere close to my goal.  We'll see how this goes, maybe by the next time I post, I'll be a calorie whore.

Your body is the baggage you must carry through life. The more excess the baggage, the shorter the trip. - Arnold H. Glasgow